Wowserz

Everything seems to be crashing down on me so fast.

My future

....mostly.

So state art contest is coming up.

little bit of stress.

o.k.

a LOT of stress

it has to be good-

i have to do something unseen by man

something S.C.A.D. worthy...

for sure.

The winner gets a small scholarship

TO S.C.A.D.

yaaaa. This is more than

"Mineral Area Art Contest"

Its the big leagues. HUGE

Heres some of my stuff... but nothing real serious.

Nothing contest worthy.

Nothing exceptional

I need something new.

Something fresh.

My art mentor said

"Its not the final look that makes a peice spectacular

Its the journey you take in creating it that makes it perfect."

What does that even mean?

My source of inspiration?

I need to find one of those.

I mean im inspired by everything around me -

i just have to figure out how to turn it into

something

something.

Y.G.

My youth group is one of the most important things in my life.
It is my escape from the horrid world of Farmington Snr. High.
They are my support system. They are my source of humor.
My youth group is my second family.

Its definatly safe to say i would be lost without my little congregation
of struggling teens... just like myself.

None of us are perfect, obviously ^^

these images show we're pretty human.

and Humans make mistakes.

The only difference about this group of humans is that

we have each other to pick up when we fall down.

Our support system is strong.

Thats one reason why i ENJOY going every

wednesday and sunday morning.

I dont feel like i have to,

I go because i want to.

And i think thats what a real youth group should be like.

Straight up.

Its Me

So I figure I should use a blog to explain a little about my self...

I'm Sierra Sitzes, and this is me ^^
I live in Farmington Missouri. Never heard of it?
Good, cause if you live anywhere exciting, you wont really care about our "small town".

My youth group is really important to me, we're all really close and support each other no matter what the circumstances.

As do my friends and I. [Who happen to belong to my youth group as well.]

I have several passions, the first being art. I hope to be an artist - hence my dream school being

Savannah College of Art and Design

art is just something im good at, a way to express myself without people reading right into what im feeling.
I feel good art is a piece that causes everyone to interpret it in a different way. Its not the same to everyone. Good art is thought provoking, and thats what i strive for in my own creations.

Music is pretty important to me too.
My favorite band forever is Relient K- No band inspires me quite like them.

But the most important thing in my life is my god.
Jesus is my best friend, and is the one person that is always there for me.
Thank you.

Ripped Contradictions

I once read that whenever something is ripped away from you its really god emptying your hands to replace it with something better. Which i guess makes sense.

To bad i don't believe it.

I understand that god puts us through certain situations on purpose. Situations that we cant handle without him. Almost like a reality check. Life kind of has to be hard if you think about it. Do you really think anyone would need god if horrible things didnt happen in the world?

Do you really think that without the survival of a hardship, praise for god would be needed?

Of course it would, i mean this is god we're talking about, here. You know, creator of the Universe, the one who saves us from burning eternally... the sacrifices he's made. That deserves a lot of praise.

But be honest, would you care if life was easy?

If all you had to worry about was what time you wanted to go to work the next day or what flavor of ice cream you felt like having?

I'll be real, I'd probably forget about him a little bit.

I mean i do now, when things are good.

When whatever i want, or feel like i need is right in my hands, or holding my hands.

But recently thats been ripped away, and what do i have to show for it? A tear-stained tShirt and muttering "Why God, why?" Over and over again.

I've been drifting I'll admit, but what I wonder is whether god had to take it to this extreme?

He knows me

right?

So he's knows how bad this hurts,

and yet.

here i am, again. In the same position i was twice before...

suffering a little bit.

I'll make this clear, I'm not bitter. I just want to understand what the reason for all of this is. I know eventually it will be revealed...but eventually makes me anxious.

I dont want to make a mistake.

and also

i want to understand.

Is that really so much to ask?